


Let Me Down, Down, Down.

by brennivin



Series: Courier Todd [1]
Category: Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Anal Sex, Blood Kink, Blood and Gore, Brain Damage, Canon-Typical Violence, Dissociation, Gun Violence, M/M, Murder, Mutants, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape, Revenge, Size Difference, Skull Fucking, Unreliable Narrator, strawberry shortcake - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-07
Updated: 2019-05-22
Packaged: 2019-10-23 17:58:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17688161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brennivin/pseuds/brennivin
Summary: The first of a series I'm writing about Courier Todd Lowell.A courier with deep-seated trauma and a quick temper wakes up in Goodsprings with brain damage and a mental image of the man responsible. He begins his journey to New Vegas, his rage seemingly knowing no pause.





	1. Law Man

It had been rough on him, ever since he had first woken up in Goodsprings.

Todd had given up on everything – his family, his career and all of his innocence – just to land this cosy courier gig. Now it was all fucked up because of this _daisy suit_ prick. It took a special kind of monster to assume himself superior to others, and this guy had considered himself entitled to something that wasn’t his. If there was one thing Todd couldn’t stand it was a man who took from others, and left them feeling put out and confused. Nobody got to do that to him, not anymore.

Anyways, he’d quickly grown tired from working with the Powder Gangers. Any excuse would justify shooting down NCR soldiers, really, but these guys had a real plight as well. They were going through _so much_ just to have their freedom back and Todd couldn’t stand by and let the goddamned law take them down.

The goddamned _fucking_ law made his blood boil.

Still, the shoot-out had been exhausting and he needed some rest. Primm would be a good place for it as he knew there were hotel options. He’d been there previously to spy on the NCR soldiers stationed there. It had taken everything in him not to take them out on sight. He’d felt that rage inside himself; same rage he always got looking at fascists through a scope.

He reminded himself to breathe. They were gone now. Not there anymore. Not his problem anymore. Breathe. Focus on the daisy suit prick.

Primm was a ghost town. There were explosives laid out over the bridge and it wasn’t clear if it was to keep the NCR back, or to keep something else _in._ He’d just have to clear the damn things and find out.

He might have never made paladin, but he _almost_ had. He’d learned essentially all he needed to. One of those skills was effective land mine disposal. There had been long, intensive lessons learning how to sneak just lightly enough that the explosives would not trigger. The field tests had taught him how to correctly switch the land mines off without panicking and making mistakes. Because of this, he was over the bridge fairly quickly. It was no sweat. He didn’t think about the paladins anymore. No use. Only felt bad to think about.

The hair tie that fastened his ponytail was coming loose so he grabbed the mass of hair in both hands and yanked them apart, forcing the stupid thing to slide back into place. It was hard to find new ones in the wasteland so it was a good thing he had another in his pack. He hated having his hair down because it got in his mouth and eyes, but he really didn’t want to cut it short.

First there was just one guy, who was around the corner of one of the casino buildings. He was dressed up like a raider and was seemingly staking the place out rather than guarding it, because he was facing the door. Breathing carefully so as to keep quiet, Todd snuck up behind him as close as he confidently could and then made his move.

The sensation of seizing your enemy from the back was always satisfying. There was always a little helpless yelp of surprise that was easy to silence with a hand over the mouth and nose. A 10mm bullet to the brain stem did the rest of the work. The crook’s head burst open at the front and he dropped to the floor as Todd moved to deal with the others.

There were two other guys and they’d heard the sound of their friend’s skull splitting from the inside. Needless to say, they were pissed off. One of them took three hits to the chest just to go down. The other went down after the courier blew off his kneecap. He finished them off with headshots. Todd was always the same methodical and educated killer, even if the ones who had made him this way were far away. They’d forgotten him by now for sure, but he’d never forget the things they taught him. In situations like these he counted his lucky fucking stars he had the training to handle them. The last thing he would have wanted was to get scooped out of a shallow grave and to undergo brain surgery just to survive, only to get gunned down by the kind of two-bounce bullies that targeted a harmless town like Primm.

The casino was called the Vicki and Vance. Todd supposed the two silhouette faces on the sign were the titular characters. Inside were, seemingly, the entire population of the town. The place was cosy, music droning over the radio and people wandering around somewhat aimlessly. The place was pretty large but there was quaintness about it. Apparently those thugs had been putting the squeeze on them for a while now. They were only a small team, too. There were more of them in the Bison Steve. Todd agreed to help, and then the robot caught his eye.

The robot was wearing a cowboy hat, and its name was Slim Primm. It looked rather like the common Protectron model, but coloured and programmed differently. Todd adored the robot.

He asked Slim to explain about Vicki and Vance. The machine gleefully told him the story of two less-than-amazing outlaws who were being immortalised in this place. It felt like being a child on a field trip, and that was a feeling Todd liked to chase. Things had been better when he was just a child, before things went sour and he changed into the jaded person he was. Once he had exhausted the information he could get out of the robot he set off to take care of the thugs terrorising the town. On the way out, he was informed that the raiders had captured the town’s deputy. A lawman.

A goddamned fucking lawman.

He smiled and said he’d do what he could, but he didn’t know if he could go through with his promise. Todd wanted to help them, he really did, but sometimes the rage would be too much for him. There had been plenty of times like that before. He told himself he wasn’t a murderer. He didn’t kill anyone who didn’t pose a threat. Sure, that was true most of the time, but what about the other times? What about Paladin Nikhol?

Fuck Paladin Nikhol, he told himself. He had it coming, actually.

This was all he could think as he stalked through the Bison Steve. The raiders’ vicious faces started to look more like Nikhol every second. He blew them off with his caravan shotgun so he didn’t have to see them anymore. He was shaking physically by the time he made it to the large dining hall at the back. Fuck Nikhol. Fuck that guy. _Fuck him._

They came at him one after another. The leader had a goddamned flamethrower but Todd was focused. He could barely hear their snarling voices or their bodies hitting the floor. All he could hear was _Paladin fucking Nikhol._

_What the hell are you doing, Todd? Settle down. I don’t want to have to report you._

The memory of the face Nikhol had made when he’d said that - Todd didn’t know if he wanted it printed on the inside of his eyelids or if he wanted to burn it out. Either way it brought a heat rushing through his body and the flames that were being launched so close to him only complimented this.

Todd’s breathing was completely ragged. He felt light headed. He put a bullet in the leader’s heart and then he realised there were tears in his eyes. Fucking hell, fuck Nikhol.

He shook the name out of his head again. He was looking for _Beagle._ Beagle, Beagle, Beagle. Fuck… who the shit it was he had been thinking about. What kind of fucking name was Beagle anyway? It sounded like a food of some kind. He heard the trembling voice of a man coming from the kitchen.

“H-hello? Anybody out there?”

He strode into the kitchen, and there was a man on the floor on his knees. He looked harried and harassed, but there was some form of relief blooming on his face when Todd arrived.

“Well, stranger, at least you’re not one of those awful _criminals._ ”

That was a word he didn’t like. Used by fascists to label people who didn’t follow their rules, even if they never agreed to follow them. Even if they never had a say. Calling these idiots criminals was like martyring them. They weren’t criminals; they were _aggressors_.

“No, I guess I’m not.”

“Weird response, but listen to me for a second. I’m this town’s deputy. If you get me out of here you’ll be doing a real solid for _justice,_ alright?”

Justice. This guy was almost trying to drive him crazy on purpose.

Or maybe he was just a basket case to begin with. That was always a possibility. Everyone else seemed to believe in this kind of thing. Was he missing something?

“So you’re a lawman around here?”

The guy nodded. “Deputy Beagle, brave sir. If you could release me from my bonds-“

Todd wasn’t pleased with what he did, but he did it anyway. His body moved on it own. His knee collided with Beagle’s nose almost without his permission. It was too late to stop himself now. Whatever he was missing, he’d take it out of this _Beagle_ creep in fucking lumps. Sorry, Nash. _Sorry, Primm Slim._

He sputtered and blood leaked out of one side of his nose, dripping down his chin and onto his leather armour. His eyes were filling up with water and he looked dizzy. Good. It looked good.

Then his boot came to rest on Beagle’s shoulder. He only became aware of his erection when he saw the lawman glance between his legs and turn beet red.

“Y-you know, I could earn my freedom by helping you out with, uh, that.” Beagle stuttered, blood still dripping out of him. It was going on the floor as he struggled to balance himself. Todd was pushing against his shoulder, making his own armour dig in painfully. “We would have to keep it secret or course; my reputation as a law enforcer means I can’t be seen as such a submissive type. Can’t help what I’m into, but I don’t want to lose any credibility.”

How fucking pathetic. He was still talking? He was still interested after getting his face bashed in? What kind of creep would get off on this? Todd looked down and saw that he was tenting as well, a flush settling into his cheeks.

Todd was starting to think _all_ authority figures were perverts.

“You make me sick.”

“Apparently I make you hard, too, stranger.” He winked, an attempt at playfulness.

Todd socked him in the jaw.

He groaned in pain again, his hair obscuring his face for a moment as it fell out from where it was tucked behind his ear. Beagle gave a shaky laugh; one devoid of hope and liveliness.

“Is that a no?”

Todd didn’t say another word. He grabbed a handful of Beagle’s hair in his fist and opened the front of his jeans quite suddenly. The deputy was surprised that he hadn’t simply said ‘yes’ and let him suck him off. So was Todd. He shouldn’t have been beating up the man he was sent to rescue. Then again, he wasn’t meant to be forcing his cock into his throat either. It seemed neither of those things would stop him. Todd never did what he was supposed to. He did what he _felt_ like. It was a shame his feelings were a total fucking mess.

Beagle choked. He gagged around the intrusion. He looked upset and everything, his eyebrows twitching to display shock, then anger, then despair ass the courier moved his hips.

He wasn’t thinking anymore. He was just fucking a total stranger’s mouth - a stranger who couldn’t even defend himself. He pinched Beagle’s nose shut with his other hand. The man made a noise in protest but couldn’t do anything more with Todd’s vicious movements. It was _hot_ and _wet_ and it was his to take, his throat clenching and quivering as he choked on it. He was in control. He was in control. He was in control.

Each thrust of his hips put more pressure on the deputy’s wounded nose, which was already starting to swell up. All this did was push more blood out, onto his cheeks and his chin.

Todd felt himself getting close. Beagle was writhing around in his bonds, the inability to properly breathe starting to visibly affect him. He looked so good like this.

Todd yanked the man’s head back, tilting his face all the way back so he faced the ceiling. He came. He closed his eyes and let go, spurts of hot semen dirtying Beagle’s face. It was mixing with the blood and turning pink in some places. Some of it had gotten in his nose and his hair. Todd let go of him, letting him slump onto the floor. Beagle landed painfully on his head and started to wriggle around in his bonds.

He looked down at the deputy, down the barrel of his 10mm pistol. The man made a whimper of a plea, his throat too sore for any kind of substantial communication.

Fucking lawmen - fakest people in the goddamned world. They made him so angry he couldn’t stop himself. It was just an ongoing pattern, with him.

-

He told Johnson Nash that Deputy Beagle had unfortunately passed away during the conflict with the raiders. He said he was sorry, because he was.

“You don’t have to be sorry. You did all you could and got those no-good gangsters out of our town.”

Yeah, that was right. He had done that. He was good.

“Guess we’ll need a new lawman.”

Shit.

He wasn’t sure what to say to that at first, his eyes wandering around the casino until-

“Primm Slim. Who don’t we reprogram him?”

Johnson Nash cocked an eyebrow at the young man, unsure of exactly why he thought the robot would be a good fit.

“I suppose if programmed well enough then Slim would be our sheriff. You’re welcome to try.” He said, half-dismissively.

Todd just took that as an invitation to start working.


	2. Black Mountain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Todd hears an unusual radio broadcast that distracts him from his journey.  
> He must kill Tabitha.

When his pip-boy detected a new frequency, Todd wasn’t sure what to expect.

He’d noticed it while camped out under what was left of a ruined building. Under the crackling warmth of his campfire he had taken a moment to check through the day’s notifications and found the new station. He’d almost forgotten to check it out.

After Primm things had been pretty boring. It was about time something happened.

What he heard was the voice of a mutant; a raspy, whining tone that he hadn’t heard a mutant use before. The voice demanded to be addressed as Tabitha. The voice demanded obedience from its listeners. No, it _invited_ obedience as if Tabitha were doing a favour to her fellow mutants in the form of her dictatorship.

Todd was frozen as he listened to the rambling broadcast. Mentions of following her orders blindly, and of human visitors being fed to centaurs sent a jolt up his spine. This was a kind of fury even he was a stranger to. After having tuned into the radio in an attempt to lull himself to sleep, he had suddenly found himself more awake than he’d been in days.

The platinum chip would have to wait. Tabitha could not be allowed to live even a minute longer.

-

By the time he had made it up the first stretch of mountain road, the sky was already looking a little brighter. It was barely noticeable but it was happening. Ed-E made an inquisitive series of bleeps.

The robot had been a little tricky to repair, but was a valuable companion at times like this. They could see further than any human could hope to, with little effort. Todd raised his binoculars and clocked the shack that Ed-E had reacted to.

“Nicely spotted, Ed.”

The Eyebot chirped almost gleefully in response.

They moved towards the small make-shift building until a hulking figure could be made out. Tabitha? Todd’s hand instinctively inched towards the pistol on his hip.

“No need to be so afraid.” The voice was kind and deep. Not Tabitha.

“Ah, sorry.” He muttered plainly.

“I’m Neil. You’re heading up to the source of the broadcast?” The mutant was a little more visible as he got closer, lit up by the lamp inside the shack that glowed through the entrance.

Todd snorted. “How did you know?”

“You’re not the first.”

There was a slight pause as Todd hesitated to ask. “And to come back down again?”

“For that, you may be the first. Time will tell.” Neil said, honestly. “You look a little more capable than average.”

Todd mumbled in thanks, and started to walk past him, when the mutant stopped him.

“Do you need help?”

He was quiet a while, considering his chances with the mutants uphill as under-armoured and ill-equipped as he currently was.

“I might, yeah.”

-

Neil was eating a huge Brahmin steak when Todd came to the fireside. The mutant didn’t hear him – light on his feet, even when he wasn’t trying to be.

This was the first time he’d had his hair down all week. At first it had been too uncomfortable with the bandage taped to his head, but as his stitches had been healing well he was now able to remove the damn thing, letting his hair fall over his shoulders. He liked it long like this. Paladin Nikhol had told him he should cut it – that he liked shorter hair. _Fuck Paladin Nikhol, he thought._

He shook the ugly thoughts from his mind. Nikhol wasn’t his problem anymore. None of the brotherhood were his problem.

He sat down by the fire, his freshly washed hair hanging over one shoulder with a thread-bare towel wrapped over it. She warmth from the fire was soothing. Droplets of water lingered on his face and neck. Neil watched him for a second and then finished his steak. Despite his intimidating size he ate politely, biting pieces off of the meat and chewing each mouthful thoroughly. Todd was eating pork and beans out of a can with a spoon.

It felt like the natural thing to do. It was normal for a courier to do this kind of thing, since they were always on the road. It was normal for Todd, because of the way he was.

Neil wasn’t the first mutant he’d ever been with, so he knew the drill - plenty of lube and a slow start. The mutant laid back and let him do his thing, watching him sink into his lap. It wasn’t too long, but incredibly thick.

It was a common misconception in the wastes that because mutants were sterile, they were less sexual. Todd knew that wasn’t true. He knew because once you broke through first impressions they were just like anybody else.

He took as much as he could; got almost all the way down to the root before he started to feel uncomfortable. He trembled and Neil asked if he was okay. Todd nodded and sat all the way down, taking the whole thing inside.

Mutant cock was a fine thing. It could fill you up to a point you never thought possible, pressing into all your sweet spots. Todd moaned when he felt it bottom out inside him. Neil matched him with a low growl and muttered some encouraging words. That deep grumbling voice made his dick jump and made him want more. He moved, making sure to keep a slow pace at first. It was as simple as half-way up and half-way down. At least, that was how he liked it.

Neil’s chest was hot under his hands. He felt his pulse inside of him. He rocked his hips and savoured every stroke against his tender insides.

-

Ed-E was able to see the ones with the stealth-boys. Ed-E saw everything. Todd listened carefully to Ed’s prompts, popping them from afar with a rifle. There was no point in getting close to a super-mutant if you were planning on surviving a fight with them. It was best to keep your distance with a firearm and a steady hand. He stayed low and put bullets between their eyes one by one. The pressure was rising as he made his way up the mountain. There were more of them the higher he went – more of Tabitha’s brainwashed cannon fodder. The ground was more steep and rough to climb, tiring his legs. It didn’t feel great to have to kill them when they didn’t know any better, but it wasn’t as if they would listen to reason when their orders were to kill intruders on sight.

Thinking about it made him dizzy so he stopped thinking about it.

The Geiger counter on his pip-boy was reacting to the weird crater at the top. Todd took some Rad-x and moved fast. These radioactive sites made him nervous and he wouldn’t spend more time than necessary in this area.

Neil was dead. He had known the mutant for less than a day and he’d been caught in the cross-fire. What a waste of life. Super-mutants couldn’t pro-create. Any dead super-mutant was a waste of fucking life, but Neil? Neil was a great person. Neil was self-less and reliable. Neil was kind of almost his.

But not really. Not at all. Todd just wished somebody or even _something_ could be his. Nothing was.

He was standing over Tabitha - Tabitha with blood gushing into her garish hair. He had been standing over Neil and now he was over Tabitha. He looked at his pip-boy and a few minutes had passed and he hadn’t even noticed. Time had passed and he’d _killed somebody_ and he didn’t remember. He took a few more minutes to steady his breathing, and entered the nearest building. He needed to be safe and indoors.

His vision tilted. No, _he_ titled. He felt a weird numbness in his hands. It was like the air had been knocked out of his lungs. This was familiar.

When he came to, counting the length of each breath and clutching at his own sleeves, he checked the time again. It was mid-day. Twenty minutes had passed. That wasn’t too bad. Sometimes he flipped out like this for over half an hour.

It was time to figure out where he was. There was one locked door he didn’t know the code for. There was a terminal, too, and a broken toy car. Other than these things there wasn’t much to see. He figured the terminal would be his best bet to find some information. That was when he happened upon the diary entries.

They were made by a repair-man, clearly. He spent a lot of time fixing radio equipment and toasters. The toy car belonged to a particularly juvenile Night-kin. He’d noted down what the door’s password was.

From there getting the door open was easy. He entered the room to see a particularly relieved ghoul gentleman in overalls hunched over a work-bench - the man who made the diaries.

“Oh. You’re here.”

Todd was bewildered. “You knew I was coming?”

He squinted, a clear foreign drawl in his accent that Todd couldn’t quite pin. “Well, you’re here because you heard the distress signals I was hiding in the broadcasts right?”

Todd blinked a few times. “Oh. The broadcasts? Yeah, I heard them and I had to come right away. You’re the repair-man.”

“Names Raul, boss.” He smiled softly. “Not sure why I called you that, but it seems fitting.”

He had tears in his eyes, and he didn’t notice until Raul tilted his head at him.

“Are you alright there, friend? Got something in your eyes, or both eyes?”

What kind of man would show him so much genuine trust after he had forcefully opened his door with a goddamn rifle in his hands? How long had he been here? However long it had been, the poor man was willing to trust somebody like Todd. Todd knew himself and he wasn’t any good.

He just cried. Eyes half-closed and his nose wrinkled, he cried. Raul was on his feet quickly, holding his shoulders in his best attempt at reassurance.

“Sorry. I’m just stressed out.”

Raul hummed. “I think that’s pretty obvious boss. You managed to get past Tabitha’s death squad, and that can’t have been easy.”

“They killed Neil.”

He realised that Raul had no idea who he was talking about, but the tone he used when he said his name told him enough.

“Well, if somebody killed a friend of yours maybe you have the right to be a little stressed.” The guy was pretty sarcastic, but he could tell he cared.

In the Mojave it was a pretty rare find, somebody who really cared.

The journey back down-hill wasn’t so bad.

-

Raul followed Todd, for lack of anything better to do. It was a good enough reason for the courier to not ask any further questions. He was an older man, even before he became a ghoul. Living as long as he had only dragged out the more unpleasant years of a man’s life. If Todd could be immortalised he’d certainly prefer being forever in his twenties over being forever middle-aged. Raul wasn’t even middle-aged. He was a little older than that.

Every now and then he would sarcastically complain about his knees feeling sore or how tired he was feeling. He said it in jest but Todd could sense a certain pain behind the words. It was like he didn’t want to accept that it was true, so he said it like it was a joke.

Todd would quip back with words of comfort, saying something about how knees were a rotten body part anyway and got hurt easy or about how it was impossible to get a good night’s sleep in the desert so everybody was always tired. He felt like the old man appreciated it at least.

The next thing to do was to get back on track with his main goal – finding that goddamn daisy suit fuck and pulling his eyes out through his urethra. It was that, or something else barbaric and horrible. His fantasies about making the other man suffer would change quite drastically each time, varying in messiness but also in creativity.

After what he had learned in Primm it was evident that the next stop would be Nipton. That was supposedly where the bastard had headed – through Nipton and into Novac.

There were raiders on the way, but Todd and Raul made quick work of them. They were junkies and had no combat training so they were sloppy. Raul turned out to be pretty lethal with a revolver, too. The courier watched, impressed, as his wrists and fingers handled the gun like an extension. It was all muscle memory and instinct. His precision was a sixth sense. Todd found himself relieved that the ghoul hadn’t made an enemy of him. It wasn’t often that someone appeared in the wastes who could be a major threat to him on their own. Luckily, Raul seemed to find him endearing and wanted to look after him more than anything. Perhaps there was something he wasn’t admitting about himself, beyond the trials of old age.

There was a shop right where the road forked off towards Nipton, so they decided to take the opportunity to rest. Todd asked if Raul knew what was up the hill and he answered with something dismissive about the NCR border point. Apparently it was packed with rangers and with Todd’s recent behaviour it might not be a great place to visit. He nodded in response. That was fair. He’d gone on a slight rampage in Primm and it was only understandable that he’d be in trouble with California’s law.

It wasn’t as if he enjoyed his moments of rage. He got lost in the mania of it all and lashed out when he saw injustice. The way he saw it the law were always pulling unjust bullshit. People like Beagle were not unusual, in his experience. It was like every time he tangled with authority he found a pervert or a fraud among them.

The outpost would have to wait. He couldn’t risk travelling there as he was – maybe when he was a little more mentally stable he could slip in with a disguise and get some information or work around there. There were probably caravanners and travellers there that needed things delivered or escorted. Places like that always had work that called for a courier’s particular skills.

For now he would eat and rest up with Raul and Ed in this old shack of a building and head for Nipton once he had his strength.

He looked over at Raul’s bedroll, where he was tucked up tightly with Ed-E under his arm. He didn’t snore but the sound of his snoozing breath was noticeable. It seemed the old man found the robot just as comforting as he did. Todd finished his packaged steak dinner and got ready to turn in with them.


	3. Nipton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Todd encounters Vulpes Inculta, and learns what he did to the town of Nipton.  
> He's killed for worse.

Nipton.

Fire. Filth. Legion.

The place had been claimed. There were obvious traces of a soul that Nipton had once held, but it was as if it had been torn out and its tendons scorched to obscurity.

Of course.

Todd watched a particularly excitable powder ganger run for the hills with tears in his eyes of combined joy and relief. To be a lone survivor must have felt strange.

He felt himself building up a sweat from the rage boiling under his skin. Reaching with a shaking hand, he undid the top two buttons of his shirt and adjusted his gun holster to ease his discomfort.

“Boss, you alright?” Raul called out from behind him.

A small gang had only recently jumped them and the shoot-out had put them both on edge. Raul knew by now how anxious and hair-tempered the man was, after seeing the aftermath of his episode at Black Mountain. He wasn’t sure exactly what the guy’s deal was, or why he insisted on avoiding Primm, but he did his best to keep him calm for both their sakes.

“I’m fine Raul. I’m fine.” Todd muttered, letting the ghoul rub circles into his back as he steadied his breathing. “Angry. I’m gonna be fine, though. I promise.”

He’d spoken a little too soon, and he knew this when he noticed that Legion dogs were still stationed outside of the town’s hall.

Todd hid behind the nearby shop, obscuring himself behind the tinted windows. It was rare to see a shop with intact windows. The people of Nipton had maintained their town with incredible care. It made him want to be even angrier at the Legion for stripping everything away, but he tried harder to manage his emotions. He’d promised Raul he would, and he wasn’t about to let his _only_ humanoid friend down.

Once he had regained his composure, he rounded the corner cautiously and Raul followed with Ed-E close behind.

The robot beeped out a concerned noise as it caught sight of the legionaries and their dogs. Todd inched closer and they just watched him approach. It seemed they meant no physical harm.

The road to the town hall was lined on both sides with bodies on crosses, hanging limp in defeat with only the rise and fall of respiration to indicate that they were still alive. It made bile rise in Todd’s oesophagus. He did everything he could to not scream and lash out. It was too much. He’d killed for less. He’d killed for much less. The Powder Gangers were good people. They’d helped him in a time of need and given him work to do. They weren’t the most peaceful bunch, but they weren’t deserving of this brutality. Nobody was worthy of organised brutality.

“Don’t worry. I won’t have _you_ lashed to a cross like these other degenerates.”

The man’s face was obscured by a pair of battered dark goggles, and his head shrouded from the sun by a coyote skin hood. He wasn’t like the others in his group; too calculating and shifty to be another of Caesar’s foot-soldiers. He had an air about him like he was watching closely. He was paying very close attention.

“I won’t be called a degenerate by you. Your crimes are unforgivable.” Todd grunted through his teeth.

The man smiled, wide and unapologetic with a flash of teeth. “You’re passionately defiant, aren’t you? You have a certain defiance I would enjoy crushing, if given the chance.”

Todd frowned and let him finish.

“Tell people what you saw here. Let them know that _Caesar’s_ Legion have begun our conquest on this land. I am Vulpes Inculta. The profligates that plague this desert know my name.”

The courier snarled as the man turned away. “I can’t let you just leave here after what you did, Vulpes.”

“Then feel free to attack us. You’ll soon learn to regret that decision.”

The group started moving. Todd reached for his 10mm pistol but felt a rough hand on his wrist.

“Boss, you ought to keep that holstered.” Raul warned him under his breath. “These guys will cut us to ribbons.”

He was right.

They found a nearby house that wasn’t rigged with explosives or robots and elected to turn in for the night. It wasn’t often that travellers found a soft bed to sleep on out in the wastes.

-

“I’m sorry, Raul.” Todd muttered at the door as he set off into the darkness of night.

He’d waited for some time after Raul had fallen asleep before sneaking out. The last thing he wanted was for his new friend to worry about him. He had to make sure that their friendship lasted. He couldn’t let Raul know what he was doing.

What exactly was he doing?

By the time he was over the ridge and spying on the camp through his binoculars he’d thought that maybe he would know. He still didn’t. He just watched as Vulpes and a few others conversed, too distant for him to hear anything.

When the group ducked into a nearby tent and Vulpes started to walk at a leisurely pace in his general direction he didn’t know if he’d just gotten lucky or unlucky. It would depend on what he did next. He decided he’d sooner be the lucky man out of the two of them and scooped a stone off of the ground.

It was surprisingly easy to sneak up on him when he was pissing, but only because he’d given the kind of first impression that made a man think he didn’t piss. Vulpes just didn’t seem like a normal human. He didn’t seem any tougher than a normal human, though, when Todd clubbed him over the head. He went down just as you’d expect any normal guy to if he were struck with a stone from behind.

He took some time to wake up, but eventually Todd had shaken him enough that he couldn’t stay unconscious if he tried. He went to scream, but Todd had gagged him.

He could see quite well since Todd had taken the time to set up a campfire. Vulpes was going to see every second of what he did to him.

He watched, unable to make an audible sound as Todd’s blade sliced away at his armour, then his clothing, and finally his skin. He writhed and groaned into the cloth in his mouth, his eyes leaking venom and his breathing ragged.

Todd watched blood spew from each wound like a man possessed. He started to feel that familiar twist in his gut and his abdomen as his cock twitched to life in his pants. He wanted more.

His blade slipped under the strap of his tear-clouded goggles, ripping them away to reveal his wide-eyed state. He lifted the hood off of his head to find his hair cropped short, only slight and pale tufts visible in the flickering light. Vulpes looked kind of attractive; with that look of fear in his eyes and that shit-eating grin of his plugged he was incredibly sexy. Todd wanted to take him apart. He wanted to truly destroy him.

As cold steel traced his jaw and cheek, Vulpes glared up at Todd. Could he tell how unbelievably turned on he was? He almost hoped he could. He kind of wanted his weird, brain-washed little mind to be flooded with equal parts of disgust and agony. If he knew how much Todd enjoyed this, that only made it better.

It was so easy to slide the blade into his eye; it sank in so quickly that he felt the very tip hit bone. Vulpes made a strangled, prolonged noise that could have been a scream. Todd watched, not moving a muscle as the man tried to kick him off, only managing to disturb the sand under him. He eventually stopped because he couldn’t anymore, taking in sharp breaths. He’d probably thought he knew pain to its full extent until now.

Todd dragged the blade back out, tipping it just enough to catch in the meat of the frumentarius’ eye. It took a chunk out with it. He tried desperately to scream again. The courier pressed two fingers into the socket and revelled in the sensation of being inside him. He indulged himself, let out a moan and bucked his hips against Vulpes’ struggling body. If the man hadn’t noticed his erection before he certainly knew now. For a moment Vulpes froze, a whole new dimension of fear and disgust flinching onto his face. Then he groaned in pain again as Todd scissored his fingers inside his eye socket, forcing more blood and meat out of the way. When he withdrew his fingers he scooped out the last large piece and let Vulpes get a look at it before he flicked it onto the ground.

Men like Vulpes were trained to die. They were taught to kill themselves rather than be captured. They weren’t taught to withstand an enemy’s torture; only the punishment of a superior. A superior would only deal enough pain to serve their purpose. A superior would never destroy you. A superior dealt pain that served a function. Todd was not a superior; Todd was not Nikhol. Todd was above nobody, and above nothing.

He reached into his pack for the hammer and a sturdy nail. Vulpes was too busy panicking to respond, still trying to untie his wrists. They were definitely rubbed raw by now. He could see that little twitch in his eye every time he moved his arms, like he was biting down.

He pushed his head down again, pried open his empty eye socket and inserted the nail. Vulpes stopped moving, possibly waiting to see if Todd was actually going to do it.

He readied the hammer and made a hard strike, feeling the bone crunch under the pressure. Vulpes was loud enough to hear now, likely screaming his vocal cords out at this rate. He hurried with the next one, and then another. He felt the nail break through. He heard the splitting sound of the back of Vulpes’ eye-socket tearing open.

The frumentarius went quiet again, catching his breath and seemingly in shock from the blow his brain had taken. His eyes looked out of focus and he wasn’t making a sound. He was swaying though, and breathing. Vulpes was alive. Todd wondered is he could still feel – wondered if he would feel what he was about to do.

He removed the pieces of bone with his finger as he had the pieces of Vulpes’ eye, scooping them out and tossing them onto the ground. The man flinched and shivered each time his fingers brushed the hot, living meat inside. There wasn’t much time left.

Vulpes wasn’t fully conscious, but he could definitely tell what was happening as Todd freed his cock from his pants. There was a twitch in his one remaining eye and a weak noise of protest. That was confirmation enough that he was conscious enough to feel this.

It took a bit of work to get into the socket, and once he was inside it took a little more work to find the wound he had made in the man’s brain with that nail. Once he found it, though, the feeling of it was worth it. He felt the opening widening to accommodate him. He listened to Vulpes’ strangled screams as his brain tissue split open and Todd’s cock pressed into it.

He was even less focused once Todd had bottomed out, and he was impressed the guy was still alive at all. He certainly was stubborn. He pulled out, slammed back in and moaned. The inside of Vulpes’ head was hot and soaked with blood, and so tight that it felt like he was being sucked back in each time. There was no point in being gentle; he didn’t have long until the bastard died.

Todd worked fast, shoving his hips hard against the frumentarius’ face. He felt the man’s body twitch and squirm inconsistently under him a few times before it fell limp. Then he watched as that remaining eye that was still fixed on his face slowly drifted and lost focus altogether. He thrusted harder, short of breath as Vulpes’ brain died and gave up around his erection. He couldn’t last much longer, making a few more desperate thrusts and coming to his climax inside what was left of Vulpes Inculta. Todd could feel his own pulse in his ears and his head as his orgasm tore through his body, his muscles seizing and spasming with the force of it. When he pulled out there was a lot of blood, and a little bit of semen that followed. It spilled out of the socket and onto Vulpes’ cheek and ear.

He cleaned himself up in silence, and started dragging Vulpes’ body back to the camp. He dumped it outside a tent full of sleeping legionaries, leaving everything on display so there was no mistaking what he had done. A couple of prisoners wearing familiar prison garb were sleeping uncomfortably by the smouldering remains of a fire, so he cut their bonds by the light of his pip-boy and poked them awake. His only hope was that they would make it back to the prison safely.

-

Raul stirred from his sleep as Todd sank back into his bed on the other side of the pitch-black room.

“Boss?”

“Had to go pee, sorry.”

“Oh. Okay.

The night was gentle and pleasant, but the silence of the town was eerie.


End file.
